7 things I learnt at BTV
It’s officially been two weeks since I returned from Beyond the Valley but don’t worry, I’m going to continue talking about it for the next two months.
BTV was my first Australian camping festival, and while it was no Defqon Netherlands, there’s a few things I took away from five days of must, dust, and crust.
1. It’s good to go off the grid for a while
If you’re with Vodafone you can kiss all contact to the real world goodbye. All the Telstra 5G towers in the world couldn’t get my texts to send through. How would people know I was front row for Yung Lean?! Despite my 8-hour daily screen time, I kind of liked not having unlimited internet access for the duration of BTV. Before most events I’d be all across socials checking to see who was there, what was going on, what to expect, and I found that it just riddled me with anxiety. It was nice not being able to constantly check in on what other people at the festival might be doing. It made me feel grateful for the friends I was with and the things I was doing, and stopped me comparing my festival experience to anyone else’s. It allowed me to be in the moment. All that being said, you know I spent five consecutive hours playing catch up when I got home.
2. Big W two person tent is actually a one 5 foot person tent
Nah because I did not expect to become the joke of the camping trip. Big W did me dirty. We got to the campsite and quickly started setting up, only to find that our tent was not like the rest. Zoe and I had planned on bunking together, but those plans were quickly crushed when we realised the tent served more as a coffin, or as our neighbour Riley kindly put it; “dog kennel”. This man had no business insulting my tent like that right after I offered him a shot of my vodka! It quickly became apparent that only one of us would be sleeping in the tent. After taking an afternoon nap in which my nose was poking the ceiling of the tent and my feet were poking out of the zip, we then realised that no one would actually be sleeping in the tent. I ended up bunking with Karri (mainly for the extra warmth) and my dog kennel was left as a storage unit until Courtney joined us on New Year’s Eve, because realistically only someone just scraping five feet could fit in that tent. BIG W I WANT MY $14 BACK!
3. Boho-coachella vibes are oUT - feral sewer rat is in
Everything my 20-year-old self knew about fashion and festivals has gone out the window. Remember this video that went viral in 2015? That was the peak of festival fashion core. Think bohemian-Angus-and-Julia-Stone-Vanessa-Hudgens-at-Coachella. BaCk iN My DaY that shit was all the rage and I can guarantee I had a Tumblr phase of reposting nothing but BOHO INDIE FREE SPIRIT vibes. This is no longer the case. The 2020’s are about embracing your inner rat, and tbh I’m not that mad about it. Being decked out in body chains, feathers, and long skirts is just not viable in an Australian festival climate (ie: dusty, musty, crusty). From what I saw at BTV along with emerging trends on Instagram, it seems that streetwear is becoming the go-to for festivals, and perhaps even clubbing. We love a cute little bikini top and cargo pants moment!! Less is more! And by day 4 who really has the effort to put together a full fit? Not this stinky gal! There’s definitely a lot more to say about the evolution of festival fashion, next blog post mayhaps?
4. Friends are more important than a New Year’s kiss
I’ve got one thing to say to those yearning for a New Year’s kiss, WHO THE FUCK CARES? The last thing I want is to spend the last 5 minutes of the year rushing to locate a mediocre man I can plant my lips on. I’ve been making a conscious effort to put myself first, and trying not to get wrapped up in the idea of a man, and I’m making that a big focus going into 2023. Sure I would love a smooch, but it’s no longer my top priority. When that clock hit midnight I gave every single one of my friends a little peck on the lips and I loved it! In an ideal world I would have met my soulmate on a sandy dancefloor at 2am boogying to Charlotte De Witte. We would’ve held hands and smooched and ate from the taco truck that still happened to be open. We would’ve sat under the stars and chin-wagged until the drugs wore off. But that didn’t happen! And that’s okay! I was able to grow closer with my friends and learn things that only a 5-day camping festival could provide. So if it’s a drunk tent shag your after, slay! But don’t lose sight of the moment!
5. Security don’t give a fuck
After receiving mixed messages on what security has been like at BTV over the years, we had no idea what to expect going in. Ultimately, we prepared for the worst; bags torn apart, clothing sprawled, all liquids confiscated etc. But when those grey clouds started looming over us and speckles of water started dropping from the sky, we knew we were in good hands.
“Stay inside your car” security said as we approached.
“Do you have alcohol?”
“No”
“Do you have glass?”
“No”
“Can I check your esky?”
“Our cars a bit packed”
“Okay drive through”
What an absolute slay right?! You’re telling me we strapped alcohol to our bodies for NOTHING? That was the only rain we saw that week so it was honestly a blessing from the universe. So the entry security were chill, but oh man the security to get into the actual festival grounds were NEXT LEVEL chill. From suggesting Karri do lines off her wallet, to openly bringing alcohol in, security could not give any less of a fuck. Most of the time you could just bypass them without saying a word. One night the security were having a little boogie when I was walking into the campsite. I thought I’d be able to skip the interaction but when they asked to see my wristband I was like “I was going to joke and say I don’t have one” to which he replied “I wouldn’t give a fuck anyway”. From a festival go-ers perspective; sexy, hot, cool, love it. From a stakeholder? Probably not so much. But hey, I’m not here to complain.
6. Showering cures everything
It was day three. The 29-degree sun was single-handedly melting my aforementioned tent. Tensions were at an all time high. My mood started to get the better of me. No-one was helping me to clean, and in hindsight, the only thing that really needed cleaning was the rogue box of Savoy’s on the floor. Before I could irrationally snap at anyone, I told myself it was time to go take a shower. The showers at the premium campsite were kind of lit. What I thought would be a large shed with cubicles the size of Bender’s apartment, with what can only be described as paper towel serving as the only means of privacy, turned out to be your own private stall decked out with a mirror, sink, hook, and a guaranteed two minutes of hot water. After returning from what felt like a dip in the fountain of youth, I returned to the campsite rejuvenated. “Any mean thing I said in the past two days was purely a result of being dirty” I said to the others. And there you have it, proof that a shower is imperative during a 5-day festival.
7. Positive vibes now, shit-talk later
We all know that five days with no personal space can really test your patience, but at the end of the day everyone is responsible for creating a positive party atmosphere. Let’s be honest, shit happens. People get on your nerves, you get on theirs. You want to go see one act, they want to go see another. A festival can really make or break a friendship. Not to sound like one of those influencers that radiate toxic positivity, but it was important for me to maintain a positive outlook throughout the five days. If someone was pissing you off you just had to shake it off and have a boogie. Like bestie we are at a huge festival in the middle of nowhere, nothing matters! Let’s have a good time! Unload all the goss later! It’s totally normal for there to be a bit of drama at a festival, let’s focus on getting litty rather than adding fuel to the fire!!
But YAH that was my somewhat recap of Beyond the Valley! This year was just a test run, next year will be the real deal!